Christmas Eve
8:30AM. Awake. Breakfast. Cereal. Berries. Cranberry nut bread. Juice. Drink coffee and chat for 2 hours.
10:30 Head over to Grandpa’s. Eat Italian cookies and pastries I cannot spell and can barely pronounce. Drink coffee for 3 hours.
2PM: Back to parents’ house. Eat shrimp, clams, conch, trout, scallops, tuna, and calamari. Assist in the emptying of 4 bottle of white wine. Blackberry pie (South Carolina blackberries). Coffee for 3 hours.
7PM: Mass. No food consumed, other than a small round crispy wafer, for an hour.
8PM: Christmas party at cousin’s house. Cannot recall all that was eaten, but remember chestnuts wrapped in bacon, pepperoni bread, cookies, meatballs, sauce, dips, spreads, cheese, and manhattans.
10:30: Come home. Pass out into food-induced coma.

Here’s to Holiday traditions of the gastronomical variety!

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